John Kerry’s ‘botched’ Christmas Card
Add another one to the list of Kerry classics….
Washington Post
By Lois Romano
Thursday, January 4, 2007
A Complex Greeting
Nothing is ever simple when it comes to John Kerry.
The senator from Massachusetts and his wife, Teresa Heinz Kerry, sent out 75,000 Christmas cards with pictures of trees at each season. The Kerrys gushed over their “gratitude for the beauty of these trees and the life they represent.”
But it didn’t end there.
The card came in an odd-looking envelope, one of those with a return-mail flap and instructions to send it to . . . well, to a recycling company, so “it can be made into new carpet tile.”
Carpet tile?
We want a “world without waste . . . where every product either returns safely to the soil or becomes a new product.”
So the card instructs: “1. Remove this panel and insert it along with the card into the envelope. 2. Expose adhesive strip and fold the flap over to seal the envelope. 3. Drop this mailer into any U.S. mailbox.”
Who else would send a Christmas card with a to-do list?
January 4, 2007 7:37 pm 
Are wingers really too stupid to understand simple instructions?
1. Was the mail carriers’ union consulted about this?
2. Let’s look at numbers: 75,000 cards. Figure a ridiculously optimistic 10% response rate = 7,500 returns. Card + envelope @ 2 oz. ea. = 937.5 pounds of raw product. Broken down, boiled, shredded, etc., netting out to perhaps half volume, 468.75 pounds. If a carpet tile weighs, what, 4 oz., that would be a total of 1,875 carpet tiles. If they’re one square foot, that’s 1,875 square feet of carpet tile.
Enough to do maybe four basement rec rooms.
If the crap just goes straight to the muni recycling center, it ends up as 1,875 Whole Foods’ paper bags in less than 3 months.
But of course, that wasn’t the point of the exercise, was it?
Nothing says Christmas like a lecture on the environment. I guess we can also expect Kerry to recycle his ‘04 compaign for ‘08.